Be Right #7: Secret Santa

What makes you feel better than doing something kind for a stranger during the holidays? Here is a great story! I only wish the news had more positive stories like this. They happen every day, but we so rarely get to hear about them.

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Be Right #6: The Birthday

This week is my birthday and today, I was lucky enough to go out for a pedicure, manicure and lunch with my friend, Maria. We were seated next to an older woman who was reading a book and quietly eating her lunch. We overheard the waitress ask the woman if she would like dessert. The woman replied that she would have a piece of cake since today was her birthday. The waitress brought her over a slice of cake with a candle on top. We wished her a happy birthday and she made a wish and blew out her candle.

It made me so completely sad to see this woman in a restaurant blowing out a candle on her slice of birthday cake alone. I felt helpless, like I needed to try and do something for this woman I didn't even know. I went to our waitress and asked if she could please put the woman's lunch on my bill. When she finished her meal, the waitress told her someone in the restaurant had paid her bill. The woman asked if it was us, we told her it was and we hoped she had a wonderful birthday. She thanked us and said she had received birthday money from her 93 year old father and had planned to use it to pay for her lunch. We told her maybe she could go out and treat herself to something else special.

I haven't stopped thinking about this woman all day, thinking how lucky I was to have so many wonderful friends & family in my life. Thinking I would probably never be reading a book and eating cake alone in a restaurant on my birthday and how grateful I was for that. I was happy to be able to do something for her, even though it was small. I hoped that somehow it made her feel a little bit special and made her day a little bit brighter. She certainly made me reflect on my own birthday this week and will make me a little more grateful every year.

Do Right #15: Slow Down

It happened again! I got another speeding ticket, my second in six months!! After pitching a fit at the injustice of the system, I accepted the fact that I need to slow down. Why am I in such a hurry? I drive fast, walk fast, eat fast, talk fast and I noticed that so does just about everyone else. All of us are in such a hurry and it doesn't seem to get us anywhere more quickly, but rather just get us there more stressed out.

Do I really need to be checking my e-mail, eating my lunch, switching radio stations, thinking about my day and driving my car at the same time? I have made an effort to order salads for lunch, you can't drive or walk and eat a salad. Now I have to actually sit and have a real lunch when I work. I accidentally left my cell phone at home recently, I was shocked at how relaxing my day was without constantly checking my e-mail and getting phone calls that were less than urgent. It was, dare I say-peaceful. Now I try to drive the speed limit and realize how ridiculously slow I seem to be driving-a scary sign that I have been driving fast for way too long.

So let me save you the several hundred dollars in speeding tickets, slow down! Eat a salad, leave your cell phone at home, be the slow guy on the highway for a day, you might be surprised at how you feel!

Do Right #14: Visit The Elderly

I have reached an age where my grandparents are getting old, very old. I feel so lucky to know them and to know them well. To know what I can say to make my grandmother laugh, to have a grandfather that will take me to dinner or to the theater.

I was born an only child with eight living grandmothers-great and great great grandmothers. The elderly have always been part of my life. I now volunteer and am on the board of a senior living facility in Seattle. I see everyday elderly people that have no visitors. People who light up just from saying hello to them or taking a moment to see what they are up to. It breaks my heart to think of them feeling alone in the world.

I try to imagine what it will be like when I am elderly and how I would want to be treated. How I would hope my children, grandchildren and friends would visit with me and be interested in me.

The elderly have so much to offer. Sure they have slowed down a bit, but they offer us so much knowledge and life experience. Take a moment to pick up the phone, call your grandparents or other elderly relatives or better yet pay them a visit. I am sure you hope someone will do the same for you some day.

Do Right #13: Silence is Golden

This originated from my husband who is a huge audiophile. He was at a listening party, where people go to actually listen to music, and someone walked in the back of the room and was rattling the change in his pockets non-stop. He then proceeded to start wringing a piece of paper he had in his hands with complete disregard for the silence in the room and the people listening intently to music.

Ironically, I went to an acoustic concert just days later and found the exact same to be true. People came in late and would talk and get situated all while the concert was already fully in progress. Then a woman who was clearly tone deaf started singing along to every song in a quiet concert hall. I don't think she could realize that we could all hear here almost as clearly as the performer we came to see.

All of this made me realize how wrapped up we all become in ourselves and don't pay attention to the surroundings we walk into. I am sure I have done the same thing at some point, I am sure we all do- talking on our cell phones, having conversations with our friends, digging through our purses, rattling things in our pockets. It is the same lesson again and again, isn't it? We need to stay present, be aware of things other than ourselves. Maybe that really is the real lesson in life.

Do Right #12: Volunteer

I was fortunate to grow up in a household where volunteering was a part of my life. My mother used to bring adults with downs syndrome to sunday school and then church with us every week. As a teenager, there was nothing more embarrassing than the crazy antics that would happen on a regular basis during the otherwise quiet church service, but my mother loved every moment she would see them and soon they became like family to us. My father was active in many volunteer organizations and was always attending a drive or holding an event for a non-profit. I spent many weekends working in the wrapping paper booth at the mall or going to a pancake breakfast somewhere.

It has become so much a part of who I am that I feel a little bit empty when I am not volunteering somewhere. I always recommend to people to volunteer for things you are passionate about, maybe it is children's causes, animals, the homeless, the environment, all of us are passionate about something and volunteering for those causes helps it bring even more meaning to us.

If you don't know where to start, look online, or walk into any non-profit in your neighborhood and see if they need help. Years ago, I walked into a senior living facility near my home and offered to volunteer. I have been there ever since and am now on the Foundation Board of that organization.

It feels great to know that you are helping your community and helping to make the world a better place. So start volunteering, get your family volunteering, the world needs your help!

Do Right #11: Be Grateful

I received some horrible news from a very dear friend yesterday. Her husband was diagnosed with colon cancer and given a life expectancy of just a few weeks. He is just 41 years old and has three young daughters.

I have heard many times before how cancer is a blessing to people because they really begin to appreciate everything they have in life. Having lost my mother to cancer, I believe this is true. It is so easy to get wrapped up in our work, our finances, our troubles, until something really tragic happens and the rest seems so small. We have so much to be grateful for. We are lucky to be able to get up and go to work every day, we could be sitting in a hospital bed day after day. We are lucky to be able to have the strength to get up out of bed and walk around each day. We are lucky to be able so sit in the sun, look out at the blue sky, birds flying and bugs crawling around. All those minute details of life we ignore from day to day.

So for all those people out there who truly are struggling and truly do need a miracle, let's be grateful for their sake. Grateful for what we do have, what we can do and the people we have in our life. Life is a short one, so take advantage of every day.