Do Right #15: Slow Down

It happened again! I got another speeding ticket, my second in six months!! After pitching a fit at the injustice of the system, I accepted the fact that I need to slow down. Why am I in such a hurry? I drive fast, walk fast, eat fast, talk fast and I noticed that so does just about everyone else. All of us are in such a hurry and it doesn't seem to get us anywhere more quickly, but rather just get us there more stressed out.

Do I really need to be checking my e-mail, eating my lunch, switching radio stations, thinking about my day and driving my car at the same time? I have made an effort to order salads for lunch, you can't drive or walk and eat a salad. Now I have to actually sit and have a real lunch when I work. I accidentally left my cell phone at home recently, I was shocked at how relaxing my day was without constantly checking my e-mail and getting phone calls that were less than urgent. It was, dare I say-peaceful. Now I try to drive the speed limit and realize how ridiculously slow I seem to be driving-a scary sign that I have been driving fast for way too long.

So let me save you the several hundred dollars in speeding tickets, slow down! Eat a salad, leave your cell phone at home, be the slow guy on the highway for a day, you might be surprised at how you feel!

Do Right #14: Visit The Elderly

I have reached an age where my grandparents are getting old, very old. I feel so lucky to know them and to know them well. To know what I can say to make my grandmother laugh, to have a grandfather that will take me to dinner or to the theater.

I was born an only child with eight living grandmothers-great and great great grandmothers. The elderly have always been part of my life. I now volunteer and am on the board of a senior living facility in Seattle. I see everyday elderly people that have no visitors. People who light up just from saying hello to them or taking a moment to see what they are up to. It breaks my heart to think of them feeling alone in the world.

I try to imagine what it will be like when I am elderly and how I would want to be treated. How I would hope my children, grandchildren and friends would visit with me and be interested in me.

The elderly have so much to offer. Sure they have slowed down a bit, but they offer us so much knowledge and life experience. Take a moment to pick up the phone, call your grandparents or other elderly relatives or better yet pay them a visit. I am sure you hope someone will do the same for you some day.

Do Right #13: Silence is Golden

This originated from my husband who is a huge audiophile. He was at a listening party, where people go to actually listen to music, and someone walked in the back of the room and was rattling the change in his pockets non-stop. He then proceeded to start wringing a piece of paper he had in his hands with complete disregard for the silence in the room and the people listening intently to music.

Ironically, I went to an acoustic concert just days later and found the exact same to be true. People came in late and would talk and get situated all while the concert was already fully in progress. Then a woman who was clearly tone deaf started singing along to every song in a quiet concert hall. I don't think she could realize that we could all hear here almost as clearly as the performer we came to see.

All of this made me realize how wrapped up we all become in ourselves and don't pay attention to the surroundings we walk into. I am sure I have done the same thing at some point, I am sure we all do- talking on our cell phones, having conversations with our friends, digging through our purses, rattling things in our pockets. It is the same lesson again and again, isn't it? We need to stay present, be aware of things other than ourselves. Maybe that really is the real lesson in life.

Do Right #12: Volunteer

I was fortunate to grow up in a household where volunteering was a part of my life. My mother used to bring adults with downs syndrome to sunday school and then church with us every week. As a teenager, there was nothing more embarrassing than the crazy antics that would happen on a regular basis during the otherwise quiet church service, but my mother loved every moment she would see them and soon they became like family to us. My father was active in many volunteer organizations and was always attending a drive or holding an event for a non-profit. I spent many weekends working in the wrapping paper booth at the mall or going to a pancake breakfast somewhere.

It has become so much a part of who I am that I feel a little bit empty when I am not volunteering somewhere. I always recommend to people to volunteer for things you are passionate about, maybe it is children's causes, animals, the homeless, the environment, all of us are passionate about something and volunteering for those causes helps it bring even more meaning to us.

If you don't know where to start, look online, or walk into any non-profit in your neighborhood and see if they need help. Years ago, I walked into a senior living facility near my home and offered to volunteer. I have been there ever since and am now on the Foundation Board of that organization.

It feels great to know that you are helping your community and helping to make the world a better place. So start volunteering, get your family volunteering, the world needs your help!

Do Right #11: Be Grateful

I received some horrible news from a very dear friend yesterday. Her husband was diagnosed with colon cancer and given a life expectancy of just a few weeks. He is just 41 years old and has three young daughters.

I have heard many times before how cancer is a blessing to people because they really begin to appreciate everything they have in life. Having lost my mother to cancer, I believe this is true. It is so easy to get wrapped up in our work, our finances, our troubles, until something really tragic happens and the rest seems so small. We have so much to be grateful for. We are lucky to be able to get up and go to work every day, we could be sitting in a hospital bed day after day. We are lucky to be able to have the strength to get up out of bed and walk around each day. We are lucky to be able so sit in the sun, look out at the blue sky, birds flying and bugs crawling around. All those minute details of life we ignore from day to day.

So for all those people out there who truly are struggling and truly do need a miracle, let's be grateful for their sake. Grateful for what we do have, what we can do and the people we have in our life. Life is a short one, so take advantage of every day.

Be Right #5: Admiration for Ambition

I had the great fortune to work with an amazing young woman yesterday named Madi. I often get asked by students if they can come and work with me for a day. I tell them to call me and very rarely do they follow-up and when given the opportunity they often don't show up. It is annoying! At that age, my friends and I worked for free-ALL THE TIME! We sometimes had two internships at the same time and were paid nothing. That is how you learn- you intern, you volunteer, you ask to work with people and interview people just for experience.

But then there was Madi, she did show up and she did work for free. All day! She worked willingly and offered to do things. She was interested and engaged. On top of it all, she was adorable and fun to be around. I greatly admire Madi's ambition and her enthusiasm. It helped remind me why I love my job and to look at my work with a new fresh perspective that sometimes you forget after doing the same thing for years, even decades! It is great to look at your industry through new eyes and see people who are excited to be a part of it.

It is easy to think kids in school these days feel entitled. You hear it time and time again from companies that have to hire staff just to deal with the entitlement issues of its new hires. Many young people would not dream of working for free, not even for a day. Many don't feel like they have anything to learn about real work experience. Where does this entitlement come from? Are all of us starting to feel entitled to things at our jobs?

But I want to thank Madi. Thank you for being ambitious, thank you for being a great example to everyone else out there. Someone is going to be very lucky to have you working for them someday!

Be Right #4: Pretty Please.

Think about how you feel when someone walks up to you and tells you how pretty you are or how handsome you are. Amazing right? With those few little words, you are beaming and confident. I have a very vivid memory of a woman working at a market in New York and a male customer walked up to her stand. She smiled and looked at him for a moment and flat out said "You are just gorgeous." She wasn't hitting on him or looking for a date. She said it so matter of fact and he thanked her and went on his way. Why is it so hard for us to just tell strangers how pretty or how handsome they are? Are we afraid they will think we are hitting on them? If we all know how great it feels to be told, shouldn't we make the effort to make someone else feel that great too. I endeavor to be like that woman at the market.